The Improved Mormon Adult Status Scale (a.k.a. the ASS) Version 1 of this assessment tool was well received, so we have made changes, corrections and some further definitions. Here is Version 2 – the new and improved Mormon Adult Status Scale (a.k.a. the ASS) as an innovative, quantifiable method for determining where you fit and whether you really are better than the family in the row in front of you or your next door neighbor. With the Mormon ASS method, there is no more guessing about who is better than whom - the numbers say it all! Callings and worthiness interviews are simplified, because the “best” and “most worthy” person will always have the highest score. This scale has been tested for validity and reliability using the same scientific methods employed by FARMS. The Holy Ghost has testified to us that it is TWUE!!! Besides, Nao Crer took it and scored a negative – this is definitive proof that it WORKS! Please add your comments to help us improve this valuable assessment tool.

Mormon Adult Status Scale (ASS)

Starting score is 100 points – all members of TSCC are assumed to START from the same place and then add or subtract points as indicated. This scale provides a point in time or snapshot assessment. Your score will change for the better or for the worse, depending on your life's circumstances. If you pay, pray and obey, you too can watch your ASS grow. The practical applications are many. Members could wear plastic nametags with their ASS score. Just think, a new person shows up at the ward and you would know their status immediately. “Look – that man’s ASS is so big, he could be a GA”. “Look that woman doesn’t have any ASS at all” As clarification or additional information, someone who has resigned or is currently excommunicated is less than nothing in status, so you start with a -100 rather than a +100. Nevermos start at -0- because, while they have no status, they are certainly not as bad as an apostate.

  1. Gender (because gender is eternal, after all)
    1. females -30 points
    2. Transgender -100 points
    3. Sexually ambiguous (hermaphrodite) - 100 points
  1. Current marital status
    1. Never married – 20 points
    2. Married, but not in the temple -10 points
    3. Married civilly and sealed in the temple +10 points
    4. Married in the temple +20 points
    5. Divorced – not currently married -30 points
    6. Divorced and remarried – 10 points
  1. Ancestry, Genealogy and Pedigree
    1. Related to a current GA + 40
    2. Spouse related to current GA +35
    3. Related to a founding family +15
    4. Spouse related to founding family +10
    5. Related to a pioneer family (handcart or BY migration) +10
    6. Spouse related to a pioneer family +5
  1. Membership Type
    1. BIC +10
    2. Convert -10
    3. Third World Convert -15
  1. Mission
    1. Female return missionary 0 points (who cares, you should have been married by now)
    2. Male – honorable US Mission +15
    3. Male – honorable Foreign Mission +20
    4. Male sent home -30
    5. Male never served -20
  1. Progeny
    1. Married female – no children -20
    2. Married male - no children -15
    3. Married with 4 or more kids +5
    4. Never Married with child/children -30
  1. Callings
    1. No calling (there must be something wrong with him/her) -10
    2. Nursery or embarrassing calling – (checking distribution of hymnals, assistant librarian, etc.) -10
    3. Ward level leadership – Bishop’s counselors, RS president, EQ president, HP Group Leader, Primary President, Ward Clerk, Exec Secretary +10
    4. Bishop, High Councilman, SP Councelor +20
    5. Stake President +40
    6. Mission President +80
    7. Regional Representative +120
    8. Quorum of 70 (except first quorum) +200
    9. Above that, you are obviously inspired, so name your own points
  1. Education (males only – females don’t need no education!)
    1. BYU Graduate +20
    2. Advanced degree from any other school +10
    3. BA/BS other than BYU +5
    4. Professional position other than Teacher (women only) -20
    5. Working outside the home (women only) -10
  1. Wealth
    1. Tithing above $10,000/yr +20
    2. Tithing $7,500 - $10,000/yr +10
    3. Tithing $5,000 - $7,500/yr +5
    4. Didn’t show up for settlement -10
  1. “Special” situations
    1. You or spouse have a disability -20
    2. Mental illness in the family -50
    3. Using Church welfare -15
    4. You/your family is a ward “project” -40
    5. Married to a nevermo -30
    6. Married to a exmo -70
    7. Married to an inactive Mormon -30
    8. Currently Disfellowshipped -100
    9. No current recommend -20
    10. Homosexual -100
  1. Bonus points
    1. Work at COB/CAB +20
    2. Senior management in a Mormon Church controlled business +15
    3. Elected official +10
    4. Public figure (sports, entertainment, author, etc.) +30
  1. Grooming
    1. Facial Hair (men only) -20
    2. More than one earring -15
    3. Visible Tattoo -15
    4. Don’t wear white shirts -10 (dark colors additional -5)
    5. Dresses that would not cover garments (Women only) - 15
    6. No tie (men only) -5
    7. No suit (men only -5
  1. Attendance
    1. Attend all meetings – stay awake without toys –listen even on HC Sunday +15
    2. Attend all meetings – sleep occasionally without snoring and/or play with toys/Franklin Planner during some talks. +10
    3. Attend all meetings and snore loudly or attend 50% of the time 0
    4. Attend on some holidays or special family occasions -10
    5. Haven’t been in the building in the past 3 years -25
    6. Don’t know what ward you are in and don’t care -35

Negatives are in parentheses ( )

Mormon Royalty...........................................Above 350
Mormon Elite................................................200 - 350
Mormon Bourgeoisie......................................100 - 200
Mormon Proletariat.........................................35 - 100
Mormon Underclass........................................(35) - 35
Undesirables who make the rest feel better......(100)-(35)
Average RfM poster.......................................(200)-(100)
Apostate/Spawn of Satan/Outer Darkness...Less than(200)